Thursday, October 18, 2012

Babies + Stress = Weight Gain

A few months ago I had a baby boy that we named Wally.  Within the first few weeks I dropped 20 pounds that I had gained from the pregnancy.  Then all of the sudden the weight loss stopped.  As I started back up working (probably too soon for a mom to start) I became stressed about finding time for Wally, my work & making sure that I was keeping my breast milk supply up.  As a result of all of this I started eating crap again.  I was telling Justin last night how unhappy I am with myself.  I'm eating food because I am unhappy that I am so large right now.  I would say I have about 40 pounds to lose until I am back to where I was prior to the pregnancy.  Why won't I just do it?  Why is it so hard for me to jump back on the wagon?

I eat oatmeal every morning because it's good for milk supply.  Everyday I stir in some peanut butter & toss a few chocolate or butterscotch chips on top.  I basically make my oatmeal taste like candy.  Yesterday I told myself I need to stop putting so much crap in my oatmeal.  This morning, I ignored myself and tossed some butterscotch chips on top again.  Then afterwards I was depressed that I let myself do that.  I thought that blogging about the experience would help me to start thinking like I used to.

I feel an obligation to get healthy again for Wally.  I want him to learn how to eat properly.  I don't want him to have fat parents.  I don't want him to know what it's like to grow up fat.  I don't want him to get made fun of in school for being fat.  I want him to be able to buy whatever clothes he wants.  I don't want him to have to have elastic in his jeans.  Ugh.  I have to get back on track.  If I don't do it for myself, I have to do it for him.

Monday, April 2, 2012

2012 Update!

Wow it's been a while since I posted anything here! Well that's cause I'm pregnant! I can't really "lose" weight while I'm pregnant but I have done a decent job not gaining too much. I'm due July 15th so right now I am 25 weeks pregnant. I've only gained 9 pounds so far... I'm sure it will be a few more when I go to the doctor next week.

Once this baby pops out though I'll be back to losing!