Holy Crap!

I bought a regular size 16 jeans from target today. The largest pair of pants I own (pre weight loss) are a women's size 28, for reals. I can't believe it. I didn't even really have the money for them, but I had to buy them.

Go me!

Oh yeah.

My fiance has a fat blog too.

www.cakeisawesome.blogspot.com

How?

Total weight loss to date: 60 pounds.

Me- in a pair of jeans that were 3 sizes ago. I have lost 5 sizes though, unfortunately I can't find the largest pair of pants I've ever owned. Excuse the mess behind me... I like the tape measure to the right of my legs. It's so hard to buy clothes online now because I am so unaware of what size I am wearing- I am constantly measuring myself.

Lately Justin and I have been getting this question a lot, "What's your secret?". Honestly I think we all know what needs to be done, it's simple: eat healthy & exercise. Everyone wants there to be an easy way out. Want to know the big secret? Justin & I have changed our lifestyles completely. I don't believe in the word diet. If you say, "I am on a diet" that implies that the change you have made to your eating habits is only temporary and once you have lost the weight you feel happy with yourself, you're going to binge on eating chocolate cake on a daily basis. That probably won't work, but you can try if you'd like. Since February Justin & I have slowly changed the way we live our lives in general. I believe that the biggest part of this equation is mentally deciding that it needs to be done. You have to realize that your life needs to change and you have to do it. In the long run you'll feel better about yourself as a whole. Here's a few tips that have helped me.

- Start slow. Don't start off by eating leafy greens & running 5 miles daily, if that's the case you will quickly burn out. We started with using the weight watchers points system. We felt it taught us to look at what we were putting in our bodies & evaluate whether or not it was a good decision. Once you've learned the basics, you're golden.

- CHEAT! Seriously, everyone needs a piece of cake every once in a while... just not, every day. It's funny but once you stop eating as much crap you realize how much you ate in the past that you didn't even like that much. I pick and choose the cake I eat.... yes, I am a cake snob.

- One of the things I've done is not cut out a few items that I feel like I can't live without. I don't think you can just deny yourself of everything. I drink coffee on a daily basis & I love half/half in my coffee... I can't do skim in coffee, gross. So, I allow myself half/half every once in a while. The fat free coffee creamers do justice though. They provide the same thickness as half/half does. The other thing I won't cut is bread. When I buy bread I buy the really hearty organic wheat. Sure the fat free might be less grams of fat/calories, but the hearty wheat has other pros that the fat free doesn't have. I don't worry about carbs, I'm not much of a potato or pasta person, so I've simply tried to cut those out of my diet and eat more bread!

- Fun excersise. I recommend bike riding and weights while watching tv.

Since I haven't updated in a while, here's a list of a few of my favorite things.




This cookbook is SO GOOD. I recommend the pudding pumpkin cupcakes & the Lord of the Onion Rings



My family's new obsession... this puppy doesn't last very long in our house.



I think I dream about this soup in my sleep. It is my favorite soup of the moment & reminds me of Autumn. I love all of the Amy's Organic's products.

Update:

Make that 55 pounds.

Yay!

I've lost a total of 45 pounds.

My inspiration?

My dad. He's lost over 100 pounds. It's amazing!

I'm Shrinking!

Down 43 pounds to be exact.

Before & "so far" update.

4 Months later and a combined total of 80 pounds lost... I think we're looking slightly slimmer these days.

Before



Recent



and we're still goin...

YES!

I've lost a total of 35 pounds, go me!

My new favorite things:



Bing Cherries- I paid $17.00 for 2 pounds of these last night on accident (I thought they were only going to be $7.00). They're my brand new favorite fruit. I'm obsessed with these little babies and they are delicious.



Stonyfield Farm fat free yogurt- I love these. I'm not a fan of most yogurt (Dannon-weight watchers- etc) but I love this yogurt. I'm obsessed with the Chocolate Underground flavor. I eat it with my next new favorite thing... and it tastes rich, indulgent and like Europe (seriously).



Kashi Cocoa Beach granola- I pair this up with the chocolate underground yogurt. It's a total of 6 weight watcher points (granola & yogurt together) but it's worth it if I have this for lunch...



Progresso Soups- HOLY CRAP 0 W.W. POINTS! (per serving- 2 servings a can)

.

Pacific Organic Red Pepper Tomato soup- I really like this a lot too. I buy the big 12 pack at Costco and keep a carton at work.

Yum.

www.foodfit.com

Really great website- check it.

Pudding Gold!

Last night Justin and I went grocery shopping and naturally went to the pudding aisle to buy our pudding. To our surprise there was a new 100 Calorie pudding flavor.... Creme Brulee Rice Pudding and it is DELICIOUS. Seriously, this pudding tastes exactly like creme brulee. So if you like the delicious creaminess of creme brulee and the interesting texture of rice... this is your pudding.

Also, here are a couple photos of us.





I'm finally starting to feel like I weigh less.

Things I've noticed that have changed since I've lost weight.

- My skin looks amazing. It's actually glowy.
- My stylist told me that my hair was nice and healthy & actually I've noticed it hasn't been as dry ... coincidence?
- I hardly ever have gas anymore, unless I slip and eat something bad.
- I don't poop as much (sorry, I'm trying to be as honest as possible)
- My mood is a lot better
- I can feel the difference when I eat something bad
- I know when I am full
- I lose pockets of fat- currently my arms & butt are shrinking.

The Pudding Diet.

I'm going to start a new diet like Jared from Subway. It's called the Pudding diet... you eat pudding every single day and lose weight. Justin & I have discussed how fat free/sugar free pudding has been a very large factor in our weight loss. Not only does pudding taste delicious, but it is only 1 or 2 weight watcher points, depending on the pudding. Now, I'm not saying you should just go eat pudding for every meal. But, if you eat healthy foods all day, a cup of pudding really makes you feel like you've had a tasty treat and it keeps you sane. Recently I've been buying the fat free devils food pudding and eating it with strawberries and light whipped cream... this is fantastic & yummy. I recommend it highly.

So far I've lost 25 pounds.

so...

It's happening. Slowly. I've lost 23 pounds total, which sounds pretty good to me. I need to add some excercise to my diet and I should be able to reach my June goal of 40 pounds. Justin's doing better then me still, but I've convinced myself it's just because he is a man and that he doesn't have the "derolf" metabolism that I am cursed with. as my grandma says, "we're all fat".

I found my dress though and it looks good on me even though I am fat, so that makes me happy.

A BUMP in the road.

Today was the first time I've tried on wedding dresses. It was the most depressing experience of my life. Not only did I not really find anything I liked, everything looked terrible on me. I felt like a ridiculous fat bride and that my bridemaids and my guests are all going to look much more beautiful then I will on my wedding day. It's very discouraging.

Justin lost 4 more pounds... I gained a pound. He also ate 2 hot dogs and french fries on Saturday. This isn't fucking fair. I should just give up. I'm going to just be fat forever, aren't I?

conflict...

It's not hard to eat healthy anymore. I'm past the point where I feel like I am denying myself. I feel like I'm not doing enough. I had a set back this week. I was on my period. Not only was I crabby, but incredibly bloated. The scale told me I didn't lose anything this week. I did really well too. I'm hoping this week goes a lot better and I don't give this up. This is very important to me.

I haven't allowed myself to buy any new clothing until I get down to my June goal- 40 pounds. Since, I've been dreaming of clothing. My ultimate dream is to be able to shop at Anthropologie. I want to own a dress from Anthropologie. Being able to wear a dress from there for my shower would be the ultimate dream come true.


(Anthropologie dress)

It's very hard to love fashion and be fat. I have tons of skinny friends that can wear whatever they want, and they buy boring clothing. I'm so jealous!

Inspiration.

Today is bad because I am in the midst of my monthly woman duty & I feel incredibly bloated.

I haven't bought a new bathing suit since I was in 8th grade. Yes, I have owned and swam in the same bathing suit since I was 14. Can you believe that's almost 10 years? In fact, it's a black bathing suit with white polka dots, a little skirt & a nice giant hole in it's gauzy lining. It's hot. I even got it from walmart. The fact is, I haven't felt the need to buy a bathing suit in nearly 10 years because I don't swim.... not in front of other people that is.

I'm losing weight for myself- so that I can swim this summer.

I want this bathing suit because it's hot & funky.

Side Dish Emergency!

Good ideas for healthy side dishes

-Quinoa ( Whole Foods has a good recipe for Quinoa, Broccolli & sun dried tomatoes )
-Polenta ( I made some tonight with portobellos, garlic, onions and veggie broth )
-Veggies w/ hummus ( if you don't like hummus, try making your own with your fav. spices )

Update: I've lost 13 pounds!

CUPCAKES!

Copyright Maggie DeRolf

Everyone needs a little indulgence.
I made these cupcakes for LOST night in Chicago & brought them to Tom and Mary's. They are 6 points each. Justin and I did a very good job saving up the points all day for a little bit of sugar. They were well worth it because these are probably the most delicious cupcakes I have ever made, thanks to the Vegan Cupcakes cookbook.



I recommend spending the money for this coobook. There are also some low fat, gluten-free and agave nectar cupcakes in it as well. I took the leftovers to work the next day so we weren't tempted to eat them all at home. Everyone LOVED them and were completely shocked when I told them they were vegan.

I am obsessed....

with the scale.

This really has to stop.

squash=yum!

Justin and I were at the market the other day and picked up a lovely butternut squash.

One night for dinner I sliced it into wedges, roasted it and brushed it lighty with a mixture of low sodium soy salt and pure maple syrup. It was delicious & incredibly healthy.

The next day, I took the left over pieces of roasted squash and dropped them into the food processor with a few cans of chickpeas. I added some yogurt, olive oil, nutmeg, curry, salt and pepper. Then I purred it to delicious hummus perfection. It's really good- I've eaten it for lunch with fresh peppers and for breakfast on top of a whole wheat bagel.

I am just madly in love with squash.

p.s. I lost 7 pounds.

Things that get me through the day...

Kozy Shack Sugar Free Rice Pudding- I add one tsp. of cinnamon to this delicious treat and enjoy. It's only 1 weight watcher point & helps curve my appetite for something sweet.



Pickled Vegetables- I didn't think of pickled veggies originally, but when I laid my eyes on these baby corn (not this brand- I bought the Santa Barbara baby corn) , there was no turning back. I also picked up some pickled cauliflower.



Starbucks Mocha Lite Frappaccino- Holy crap this is yummy & it's only 3 points for a grande! When I'm feeling like having a treat while Justin & I are out shopping, I def. don't feel guilty picking up one of these. I think it actually tastes better then the reg. frap. It tastes a lot more like dark chocolate.



Stretch Island Fruit Leather- Really good & has a variety of flavors (tropical is a bit sour though). It's only 1 point and allows me to munch on something sweet at work when there's donuts everywhere.

I'll update more later once I discover more delicious foods.

The Points System

For the past few days Justin and I have been keeping track of our food intake using the Weight Watchers points system. I remember doing weight watchers a few times in my life- once when I was about 13 & I actually lost a lot of weight doing it. The other time was with my Aunt Bev when I first started college and I didn't lose anything- probably because I was emotionally distraught and didn't have the will power to keep up with it. So far it's been easier with Justin at my side. We keep track of each others points and review them at the end of the day (to make sure neither of us is cheating). It requires a lot of trust because believe me, when you get to be this heavy and food becomes THAT important to your emotional well being (even though it really isn't) you will do anything (even if it means lying to your fiancee) to eat a donut. I've been completely honest with him about everything I eat. If I lie, I feel like I'm not being honest with myself. If I really don't have enough will power to keep myself from eating one stupid donut (that probably doesn't taste THAT good anyway-ecspecially if it's from dunkin' donuts) then why am I attempting to change my life? Eating that donut is only going to hurt myself in the end.

Today I ate:

Breakfast- I woke up at noon because of my long day of work the day before (no breakfast)
Lunch- Veggie Burger w/ my low fat mayo mix (low fat yogurt w/ dill & garlic) sandwich
Snack- Sugar Free Rice Pudding (my new favorite treat- it's only 1 point! and is DELICIOUS)
Snack- Coffee with fat free vanilla creamer
Snack- Broccolli
Dinner- Turkey, Brussel Sprouts & Roasted potatoes w/ garlic and rosemary
Dessert- Frozen Strawberry Bar (yum- 1 fantastic point)

I think we're going out to lunch tomorrow at work- we'll have to be on good watch.

BTW: I lost 5 pounds since 1 week and 1/2 ago when I last weighed myself. Sweet deal.

Who needs cake?

Today was great. I did so well. It's a lot easier to follow this life change when you have someone who is serious about it as well and can keep you on track. He knows what I eat and I know what he eats. We help eachother make decisions about what we're going to eat next. I guess it's kind of like a game. Every time I think about how bad I'd like to eat a piece of cake (which we had in the office today) I try to remind myself how badly I want to be healthy when we decide to have babies in the future. All of the overweight people I know (that have had children) have nothing but terrible experiences with their pregnancies. On the other side of that, all of the healthy people in my life (that have had children) have had fantastic healthy happy pregnancies. I'm not saying I want to have children now, but it is a good idea to start this "getting healthy" thing now, before it's too late.

I'm not losing weight for the wedding. It's a plus, but I think I'll be a beautiful bride no matter what. My grandma is obsessed with me losing weight because I'm going to be a "bride" and I can't be a "fat bride". It's really annoying. I have a lot of problems with how my grandmother feels about image. I'll post about that later.

This Sucks.

All I want is a freakin' Fazoli breadstick and I can't have one because my fiancee won't let me. I'll be happy about this decision later, but right now all I can think of is it's buttery garlicy goodness... all 100 calories of it.

This is Hard...

Yesterday I did really good all day. I even tried (key word-"tried") to accomplish my goals. After I returned from my afternoon trip to Macy's, I bundled up and took Ruby out for a walk. About halfway through the walk, I slipped on the snow and almost cracked my head open. I realized that I was more comfortable living another day as a "fat chick" then dead, so Ruby and I made our way back into the warm house. Plus, I think Ruby was choking on some snow she sniffed up. I'll try again when it's not 10 degrees out.

I made out most of my shopping list, and hopefully I'll be getting to the store this weekend to pick up my healthy treats. I need to have an over abundance of healthy foods in the house, or I'll get really sick of eating the 3 healthy things we have and eat some cake or something.

This morning I made a mistake and ate a piece of carrot cake. I'm sick though, so I decided to let myself slide. I'll behave the rest of the day and eat my "yummy" lean cuisine for lunch. I hope I get over this cold because I have a very busy weekend ahead of me. (take the cousins shopping, photograph Olivia, meet with the future in-laws, meet with the wedding planner, Charlie's birthday party... etc.)

Today's Goal: Eat healthy for the rest of the day & get a good nights sleep.
Tomorrow's Goal: Put less sugar in my coffe.

Fat Maggie

That's me, on the left, the fat one in the photo. Over the years I've gotten used to seeing myself pictured next to ladies that are a lot more slender then me. I think that's a pretty positive thing. I know a lot of thin women who hate seeing themselves in photographs. I never really understood their logic. Every day of my life people see what I look like. They even see angles of my body that I will never ever see because it's not physically possible (at least at this weight). So, why would I hate a photograph of myself? I don't really mind. I'm not sure that people are afraid of what other people notice about them in the photograph, but what they notice about themselves. When you see a photograph of yourself, you have to look at the traits you feel insecure about. You can't obscure your problems, push them back and ignore them when they're right in front of your face. Every time I see a photo of myself I can't help but feel somewhat like a failure. I know that I need to lose weight, but why don't I just do it? The concept is really quite simple. You eat healthier foods in smaller portions and you exercise. Right? All of these things make you feel amazing when you make them part of your routine so why do I have such a hard time doing so?

Why do I want to lose weight? I'm not going to lie, one reason is because of how I look. I can't help it, we are all a little vain. But most importantly, I am concerned about my health. I can't live like this forever because the older I get, the more my weight is going to affect how fast I age. I would like to have healthy pregnancies and be able to keep up with the children I bring into this world. Most importantly I would like to feel my age. I feel like my body is much older then 22. I mean, jesus I have spider veins! Lastly, my wedding is on October 4th of this year and dammit, I want to look hot. For once in my life, I want people to tell me I look good.

Tomorrow's Goal: Go for a walk w/ the dog & make a grocery list of healthy foods.